How do you design a public meeting when you believe that everyone has something to share, not just the vocal few?
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An emotional upset and a ski trip helped me unearth two limiting beliefs about my relationship skills.
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The energetic pattern of a gathering, both in how we design them ahead of time, or the dynamics during the gathering, need our constant attention. One of the ways I keep an eye on things is to ask: are we aiming to fix or improve?
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What would it mean for a city to embark on a host-as-all-of-us journey, for citizens to be in conversation with ourselves about who we want to be as a city, and what it will take to be that city?
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I caused a disturbance a few years ago. Near the beginning of a three day meeting of a community I am part of I spoke up, as a participant, and named a harmful and racist practice in which many of the group were participating.
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When we use technology like Zoom, even with a panel presentation, when we choose to allow participants to see each other we are allowing the community that has gathered to see each other and make further contact with itself. We choose to enable, rather than disable, community agency.
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I’ve long been struggling with how we can gather in ways that are socially proximate. When we gather at conferences, for example, we are physically close, but socially separate as we sit and listen to the expert sage on the stage. I’ve had what I call “a keynote itch” that needs to be scratched. And it will work both face-to-face and online. I call it Street Corner Visiting.
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At a conference where the crowd assembled believes in designing cities to mitigate and adapt to climate change, we avoided talking about the heat—the emotional heat. And avoiding emotional heat means avoiding the hard work needed to effect the changes we say we want.
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He was a conference speaker with an urgent message: we must change our ways or we will die. We will only save ourselves if we do what he says, what he prescribes.
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My two kids are great at metaphors. The latest: that they are buying a car “with training wheels”. Whether it is kids, co-workers, students, anyone for whom we serve as training wheels, this experience has taught me a few vital things about my relationship with the sovereignty of people making decisions, whether they are my kids, clients, friends (or myself!):
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